My plan B, God's plan A

Sometimes when I make plans and they don't work out exactly the way I was thinking, I say to myself "alrighty then lets just go to plan B".  I can't tell you how many times I have said that over the past few weeks during the application, interview, and waiting process of applying for Child Life internships.  As the process was going on and I was getting some interviews and a few "no's", I started to think to myself that I should probably get my ducks in a row for graduating just in case I don't get chosen, aka plan B.

Yesterday (the 9th) was Offer Day for all of the applicants who had applied.  Every hospital around the country has to let their applicants know by this date and then applicants have 24 hours to accept or deny the hospitals offer.  Needless to say, I woke up yesterday nervous but excited because I felt like my Pittsburgh interview had gone so well and I most likely would be accepted and that yesterday was gonna be a day of celebration.  As the day wore on, no email came and I started to wonder if plan B was really going to happen and was preparing myself to be okay with that plan.  I was processing my emotions of disappointment but really trying to turn my thoughts towards God and allowing myself to be surrounded by His comfort and trust.

It was as I was going to be last night (with still no answer from CHP) that I realized as I was planning for plan B, I was in a way saying that I thought I had control over the situation.  If this process has reminded me of anything it is just this: that I in fact do not have control and that God has the ultimate and best laid plan for my life.  I realized that as I was looking at mediocre plan B, the one where I would have to wait another semester to complete and internship and have to something other than what I thought should come next, I was doubting what God could do in my life.  I was running away from the peace-filled trust that can only happen when I honestly believe that God has my best in mind and wants to "offer me life to the fullest" (John 10:10).  If my time in Guatemala had taught me anything it was that God wanted to bless me with the chance to live life to the fullest and trust in the plans He has to help me "to prosper, not to harm me, to give me a future and a hope" (Jeremiah 29:11).  As I was falling asleep last night I realized or was reminded I suppose that often times what I perceive as plan B is usually God's fantastic plan A....the one He wanted me to have in order to give me the best and fullest life dedicated to Him.

The amazing thing is today I got an email with an internship offer at Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh!  I was hopeful and I thought just maybe, but I had my doubts and was starting to feel the disappointment.  I know that God had this in His plans, for whatever reason, to make me wait a day longer than I thought, to have me stay in Pittsburgh for just a little bit longer, to remain in His comfort because things of this world don't always go at our timing.  I'm not gonna lie, I wanted the chance to go to a new hospital and move to a new city and venture off.  For those who know me well, I love to be on the move but for some reason God has me here and I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that He has me here for an amazing reason and I am excited to be able to reminde myself of that everyday.  I feel so so blessed to have been offered the internship at CHP and can't wait to see where God takes me as His plan unfolds. :-D